I have had MANY spectacular adventures writing about comics. I have been kidnapped by merpeople, (though they prefer the term H-2 Hombres) I have been transformed into a mummy, I have even been shrunken down to the size of a pretzel rod and eaten by a drunk. In all that time I can honestly say I have NEVER been pestered by a leprechaun…until last Tuesday.
Now he’s staying in my cave and he won’t leave me alone! He keeps poking me with sticks while I’m trying to sleep, and the most annoying part is that he denies he’s doing it. He puts the stick behind his back and shakes his head saying “No I’m Not, Boy-Oh.” DUDE, I can see the stick right behind you!
ADVANCED R&D
One of the few advantages to this arrangement is all the free comics I could wish for! See, Leprechauns LOVE comics, and they like to read them in advance, so he keeps using his Leprechaun magic to summon up the week’s titles BEFORE they hit the street! I’ve already read the SMASH first issue of IDW’s new relaunch of Mars Attacks #1! INCREDIBLE! I sure envy you guys reading that book for the first time this Wednesday, because Chew writer John Layman knocks it out of the PARK! That big secret thing that happens on page 7?! BRILLIANT!
I’m probably going to have to go to the Forbidden Planet to buy the Mars Attacks: Classics Vol. 1 book of reprints from the past. Same goes for IDW’s Complete Bloom County Vol. 5, also available on new comics day. The Leprechaun can’t magic up reprints or collections. Weird. I’m not sure how he got that new copy of this week’s Chew #27, as it’s more of less a reprint…must be all the new material jam packed inside.
Whatever, I have plenty of other, magically summoned new issues to get through! The long delayed first issue of Dark Horse’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer tie-in title Drusilla hits this week and, as promised, it is written by Drusilla herself, Juliet Landau. As a guy who read most of Anthony Daniel’s comics featuring C3-PO, I can tell you first hand that actors writing their own material doesn’t ALWAYS play out, but “HEY, If it’s on the crazy Leprechaun’s pull list, who am I to argue?”
MUST HAVES
Another advantage to having a Leprechaun roommate is all the single malt whiskey he magic’s up to drink, although that’s also kind of a disadvantage. I have an amazing pile of comics to get through, Including the action packed Savage Dragon #180, Batman Incorporated #2, Dark Horse Presents #13, and Before Watchmen, The Comedian #1 (Written by 100 Bullets’ Brian Azzarelo) and I’m so tipsy I can hardly walk straight to pull one of them out.
The Leprechaun’s a DC guy, so he refused to grant my wish for Astonishing X-Men #51 (a momentous issues to say the least!), Avengers Vs. X-Men #6, OR Hulk #54. S’probably ok as I think that whiskey is a bit too strong for me to think any more.
Isss thisss really whisssskey? I think that Leprechaun magically schwitched the fluids in thisss bottle. It – it kinda’ ssschmells like…chloroform? I’m drinking in pure chloroform?
Hmmm. I’d be alarmed if I wasn’t sssooo ssslleepy. Darn that pessssky Leprechaun…darn you to he-
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
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More musings from Unkiedev, Earth’s own sidekick, can be read at unkiedev.blogspot.com
